“Maybe its not a disease! Maybe its a Gift!”
“You wouldn’t consider it a Gift if you saw what I see!”

Would you consider it a gift if you had the ability to see spirits?
Or a curse?

Its a Catch 22, isnt it?

Here is the chance to communicate with loved ones that have passed on. You have the chance to pass on their last words to anyone they choose. You can give closure to the grieving. Or with your Gift, close unsolved cases, that is if the police wants your help!

The downside would be the spirits that are malevolent. You would probably see scary stuff!  “Seeing” other people’s secrets when you touch them.

Would you hide behind meds or have yourself locked up in a mental ward just so you wouldn’t have to deal?

When I was younger, I would have precognitive visions all the time. Since they rarely occurring now, I would assume its because of my medicine.

I would admit it, I would be a coward. I don’t think I would be strong enough.

I mean, my empathy is weird enough, tolerating people’s emotions is bearable. my link to Chad was bearable. Smelling a man’s cologne whenever I sensed my spirit guide near was bearable. But seeing dead people? nooo!

anyone who has some psychic gift must be extraordinary!

“You are not sick. You aren’t crazy! You don’t need these fucking pills! I love you, but I’m not going to let you live like this anymore! You have a Gift, and its time you face your fear!”

What does it say about a man or woman who stays with their loved one after witnessing  and living with all the drama that comes with being a psychic?

I would think anyone with the emotional capacity to stay with a psychic is truly amazing. It shows a great deal of love, integrity, patience, and compassion.

Hmm I wonder if I am capable of such things.


Excuse my many emotional random rambling thoughts!!!!

That cold medicine, horror movies inspire a very brain-numbing entry!

Go me!!!




Sometimes I wonder how does one find peace within themselves, when there is so much negativity around them?
Pray. Meditation. Music.
Finding my zen is sometimes elusive.
Is yours?


Last night before she went to bed, I had asked K to say her prayers.
I had assumed that my sister was listening to her say them while they were here, and since they had left my parents.
That was a huge assumption. And a joke to think my sister would care about my niece’s spiritual well-being. Especially after all the stuff K has been thru.
“Why?!” K asked.
“What do you mean, why?!” I was mortified. Offended. (I guess this is what my mother went thru when we were kids)
“Oh Rebecca she doesn’t have to say her prayers!” My snapped.
Well my mortification went straight to anger and panic. K’s weird behavior was intensifying, if she was indeed playing on my fears and anxiety she was one smart socialopath in the making. If not, something else was influencing her behavior, and it would not be tolerated!
My sister was lucky I had been in the bathroom changing or she would have been clocked! “Do not ever say that!” I snapped. “K please say your prayers!”
Moments of silence passed, “k I do not hear you! Please may hear you?!”
“She does not have to say them, its not bedtime!” My sister cried.
My anger fled, and my anxiety returned.
In the shower, I prayed for K’s spiritual well-being. Her health, her mentality and the ability to pull thru whatever chaos she was in, with pure of heart and no residual effects so to speak.
My faith gives me comfort, I was hoping K would find comfort and peace by talking to God.
I don’t know how parents do it. All this constant worrying over the well-being over their child! My sister is so oblivious, that my anxiety goes thru the roof!
I am wondering would my anxiety towards her spiritual growth, put my own faith at risk? Because isn’t my anxiousness questioning the strength of my love for God?!!!


Had to meditate, do some prayer work!
The negativity here is horrible!
How can one person create so much darkness wherever she goes?!
I prayed that I wouldn’t affect anyone like that!
I wouldn’t want to be that kind of person!
Then I prayed for my sister!
And let it go.
Hopefully, all will be well!!!



I am happy I found this prayer.
Often times I find myself allowing the idea that I have to be in love to be happy.
To be with someone to be happy.
In those times, I am the most unhappiest.
I realised those are times when I havent stood strong in my faith.
Am I not questioning His plan?


I hate trying to persevere

I hate trying to find hope in a well of darkness

when I stumble I hate trying to pick myself.

Giving up. Hate.


Those horrible words.

We think will crumble under the mighty weight He has given us

but He has faith in us.

He knows we can carry the burden.

His love will guide us through the strain and tough times but faith never wavers.

It must never waver.

For at the end of the day, we may never see our family, our friends may not be who they say they are, Our lovers will reveal their true selves, He will remain steadfast. An anchor in our lives.

– My thoughts before bed.







I figure people waste too much time getting people to like them.
I don’t care if I’m liked. I don’t worry if people accept me.
That is their problem not mine.
I don’t need their validation, and neither should you.
Its a beautiful world out there, with beautiful people, we just need to appreciate!


That horrible sensation of the chill settling in your bones, the hair standing up on the back of your neck, and the racing of your heart in your chest.
I wasn’t afraid, as I laid there in my bed last night.
My ears humming as if someone had been talking about me.
No, that wasn’t fear creeping down my body. Just awareness that something wasn’t right and I couldn’t put my finger on it.
Ugh. Whatever it was, kept me from sleeping!